Capturing Your Child's Heart

Grandma Farm said...

Hi Jena,
I'm really enjoying your blog...
I have a question. Can you expand more on how you captured your children's hearts in the early years? Obviously you have a great relationship with your oldest college student.

This is a great question. In fact, I believe having your child's heart is the most important factor in successful parenting and home schooling. Thanks for bringing it up.

How do you know if you've captured your child's heart?

Your child trusts you.

Your child wants to please you more than anyone else.

Your child wants to be around you.

Your child seeks your advice and takes it.

What prevents us from holding our child's heart?

"I'm angry at you."

"I'm too busy for you."

"I think you're stupid."

As a young mom I read two books that changed my life forever. They were The Search for Significanceand How to Really Love Your Child.The first one made me look at myself and how I needed to change my thinking. The other taught me how to communicate love to my children. Another important book was The Blessing.That's where I learned to say this often to my kids: "You are a treasure and a blessing from God."

With a heart turned toward your children and time to be together, home schooling is the perfect environment to capture your child's heart. Build that strong foundation from the beginning and shore up the sides as long as you can. You're building for the future. Then when your child hits those turbulent years looking for independence, you have that history of love and respect. Just yesterday I thought Melissa was acting a little disrespectful toward me. I said, "Melissa, I am always kind to you. I just don't get it." And a few minutes later she said, "I love you, Mom....Thank you, Mom."

Practical Ideas for Capturing Your Child's Heart

Just be together. Share life.

Look your child in the eyes when he talks to you.

Keep your promises.

Respond positively to your child's cries and complaints. You are building trust.

Let your child sit on you, hang on you, and follow you around. You are communicating that they are important to you and not a nuisance. Don't worry. They eventually go off without you someday.

Believe in your child's ability to succeed. They learn who they are and what they can be from their important people--you. Every child can find what they love to do and what they can be good at.

Of course, I could go on forever, but I believe these are the basic building blocks of holding your child's heart. Then when they get older, they'll find someone else and you can pass their heart on to that person. But in the meantime, keep it safe and warm.

Related Posts
Yes, I scrolled through my entire blog and pulled out things even remotely related.

My Education Philosophy

Facing Resistance

What Makes a Good Home Schooling Parent?

A New Phase of Life

It's Easier to Build Strong Children

Home Schooling in 1745 England

Timing is Everything

Home School Meets Public School

Our Home

Saying No to Your Kids

Setting Boundaries for Kids

Everything You Need to Know About Parenting

Motivating a Child to Learn